Your first call with a stranger

Find somewhere you can talk without being overheard, or at least somewhere you don’t mind being overheard. Put on headphones if you have them: they stop the other person’s voice from echoing back through your microphone, and they make quiet voices much easier to hear.

Decide in advance what you won’t share. Your full name, where you live or work, your school, your phone number and your social media handles are easy to let slip when a conversation is going well. Knowing your line before you start means you don’t have to think about it in the moment.

When the call connects, both of you are usually waiting for the other to speak. Go first. It doesn’t need to be clever:

• “Hey! Can you hear me okay?”
• “Hi, this is my first time on here.”
• “Hello from a very rainy evening. How’s yours?”

Admitting it’s your first call is a surprisingly good opener. It gives the other person something easy to respond to, and most people are kind about it.

Without faces, the rhythm of a conversation lives entirely in your voices. A few small things help:

• Ask open questions. “What did you do today?” goes further than “Did you have a good day?”
• Leave small pauses. On audio, people talk over each other more than they would in person. A beat of silence after someone finishes lets them add the thing they were about to say.
• Say what you’d normally show. A nod or a smile doesn’t travel down a call. “Ha, that’s great” or “oh no” does the same job.
• Share a little of yourself. A conversation where only one person asks questions feels like an interview. Answer your own question too.

If you’re stuck, our list of conversation starters has plenty to borrow.

Some calls just don’t click. Maybe the other person is distracted, or you’re both tired, or you simply have nothing in common. That’s fine. A friendly “Nice talking to you, I’m going to head off” and a tap on End call is a perfectly good ending. You don’t owe anyone a long conversation, and neither do they.

If a call turns unpleasant, you don’t need to be polite at all. End it. If someone harasses you, report or block them from the call options menu. The safety page explains how both work.

Calls on Whislink are one-off: there are no friend lists and no way to look someone up later. That can feel strange after a great conversation, but it’s also what makes it easy to be open. Nothing you said follows you around. Take a breath, and when you’re ready, start another.

• Conversation starters for talking to strangers
• Voice chat etiquette: how to be good company
• Why voice-only? The case for talking without faces